brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
