weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
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