Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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