Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
