That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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