Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
and you fell through a lawn chair
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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