Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
When are your genitals available?
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
