I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
tell your sister to shave her snatch
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
