Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
