She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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