Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
