Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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