Nicole vs. Life
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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