I wish you could order shots online.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I'm at about main and main street
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
