i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Randomize
