"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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