Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
