I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
