you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
