so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Randomize
