Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize