hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Randomize