i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
So gin and wine won't be happening again
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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