I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize