i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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