How'd it feel making her break her religion?
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Randomize
