scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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