I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
