Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
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