Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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