we have pet lesbian snakes
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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