a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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