At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize