Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
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