making cat noises will not fix the situation.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize