I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
