i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
