I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize