I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
