I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
