he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
