Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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