i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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