She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
My farts smell like burning tires and false courage
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize