So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
