I wish you could order shots online.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
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