I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
