I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Randomize
