just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
