I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
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